At the Feet of Jesus

Friends, this is a vulnerable post. I’m offering a glimpse of my morning prayer time. It may explain my recent journey and awakening to the world of politics. Please forgive me for any unintended offenses.

I sat down in the early hours to spend some time with the Lord. My heart was heavy. I felt a pulling, a yearning, a burden. It was mixed with empathy, conviction, a moral heart not wishing to chase anyone away. As a peace maker, I hate conflict. Guess we would all agree that in this world, you will have trouble. Times when your soul is churning in a tumultuous whirl. This morning found me caught in anger, deep sadness, grieving for better days. As always, I struggled to be heard. My dad would say that I always had to have the last word.

He was right. But now days, if I spoke out, it would be at a cost. My friends might not like me. They might discard me as they “hide” me from their profile. They may not want to hear what I have to say. And what makes me think that my thoughts are important anyway?

For the past several years, I’ve held my thoughts close as not to offend anyone. I had learned that from offending them. It was a confusing lesson. After this prayer, this morning, I may not be able to be silent any longer.

Please join me on this particular morning as I sit with the Lord. Me, my Bible, worship music in the background, pen and paper at the ready. Here’s a peek. As I said, this is extremely vulnerable to share. If you’re reading this, then God led me to share it.

A friend recently gave me this advice. On a scribbled note, in my Bible are her word. “Cindy, God gives steps. Obedience. What’s next? What’s next, until He quits giving you a what’s next or you and others sense its publishing time.” And with a smiley face to confirm her words, this little slip of paper as become a book marker in my most precious book of all.

At the Feet of Jesus

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High, who abides in the shadow of the Almighty, my God in whom I trust.” Psalms 91:1-2

O God, we need you. I will trust in you. For you alone are the Most High God. The enemy is on the war path! And he uses people to spew his lies. With hate they back the father of lies. I doubt that your people can see the depth of his deception.

Do they unknowingly support policies that would rip a baby from the womb? Father God, forgive us. At one time, I too, was guilty of believing the lies. I’ve been apathetic to the practice of abortion. I had resolved myself to the Supreme Court decision, as if nothing I could do would make a difference. Honestly, I’ve confessed this to you before, Lord. But I stood by and did nothing. I didn’t think anyone would listen. I didn’t think anything would change.

But then you raised up a David. A president who would move that decision back to the fifty states. Praise God! Change was coming! Hallelujah! My heart was excited. And yet, I was so blinded. I didn’t know that things could get worse. I only believed now we had a chance to fight for these rights.

As he does. Satan; he prowls around, seeking to kill, steal and destroy. It would only take a few years. Once again, I would be reminded that I did nothing. But how could I when I hadn’t paid attention? Who knew that satan would be so clever, cunning, as he worked through people to pull off another murderous agenda, another tactic?

Father, you were there with me, when Mark Koran, Minnesota State Senator, said that a Minnesota law was passed approving full-term abortion. I was shocked. That’s putting it mildly. The thought hung over me like a rain cloud. You made a way for me to have a conversation with Mark after the meeting. I had to verify. Did I hear him correctly?

I’m sure my face was frozen in disbelief as he answered, and confirmed that I had heard him correctly. After a conversation that was more than my brain could handle, Mark gave me his business card and invited me to call his office the next day. They would send me a link to the more than 70 laws that had been passed in my state over the past year. He told me that many of the laws would be against the values that I hold, as a Christian.

Lord, I accepted that invite and within hours, I would have the link. This is not ground that I have ever traveled. Politics is not my thing, Lord, you are. Researching your words, learning about your goodness. But trying to read these documents that were not meant for the average citizen to understand? Lord, I’m over my head.

But I can’t seem to let this go. Abortion. The lies. The deception of our local media. So much to learn! What do you want me to do, Lord?

Recently you highlighted Leviticus to me. I've shared that journey before. But you seem to be reminding me about the passage that discusses babies sacrificed to Molech. Your Word is clear that you will not put up with that. But I was stunned to realize that I was held accountable for these babies, as well. For your Word says that those who stood by and did nothing, are guilty for the deaths of these babies, too. For 50 years, I have stood on the sidelines. Father God, more than 63 million babies have been torn from their mothers’ womb. The very place that you created to nurture and secure the growing baby. Mother and baby; intertwined in DNA, blood supply, emotions; and in awe,; as they played their part in the most exciting miracle! Held together in love. In that safest place, a baby would be given everything he (or she) would need to grow.

Father, again I ask you to forgive me. Forgive me for my part…living idly by, ignoring the statistics of abortion, the pain of your most vulnerable and innocent.

And now I learn that in Minnesota, a woman can give birth to a full-term baby and decide she doesn’t want it! The baby will be left to die-as the law includes that there will be given no life saving measures for botched abortion. That’s murder! My heart cries. Indeed.

My heart is broken! I can no longer be silent. I will no longer stand by as life is torn limb by limb, sucked out and discarded in a trash can filled with baby parts. THIS. This is a most important issue to your heart. I feel the intensity of it. Now I feel the responsibility to bring awareness to this atrocity, rests upon me, too.

Father God, I come before you, humbled, covered by your grace and mercy, to say I’m ready. Show me what you would have me do. To write and bring awareness? To post these thoughts on social media? Please go before me, follow behind and hem me in on every side. I’ll take my steps of obedience and trust you to lead me. It is in your precious name, Jesus, that I ask for your guidance. Amen.

*Reader-stay tuned as I plan to discuss other aspects of abortion. I hope to provide the links to our Mn Legislature website, so you can read the laws. But be warned, once you know, really know---well, fortunately for me---that's on God.